There have been many changes in my life lately. Subtle, small, normal changes. And deep, soul-sifting, momentum building changes. People moving on, or staying the same. Abundance flowing in. The Spiritual soil long watered at last yielding up it's crop.
And I ride the wave of momentum. Shift my perceptions and sift through the silt of cultural conditioning to find who I am beneath myself. I read. I ponder. I walk. I work.
I dream.
The spirit takes me to places I did not expect. Places a younger me could not have gone. I long to be intrepid, yet trepidation takes me every so often. Steps forward and backward... And always forward again. Always hopeful. Always beautiful.
Through it a sense of purpose begins to unfold... Veiled, shadowy, draped in silken robes of mystery. It reveals itself in bits, a burlesque of the soul. And I revel in the tease. The ebb and flow. The tide that carries me ever closer to the shore that lies at the core of me.
I entreat you to take a Journey with me. A jaunt to the heart of these transitions. Over the next several weeks I'm going to follow a guided journal to seek purpose. It will take me through the past and future to find the truth of now. I will try to blog everyday, but grant me patience... These soul revelations leave the physical body in need of more rest, and I desire to honor the whole of me through this.
Here's to traveling afar in the comfort of your own home!
Peace.
"A Promise lives within you now."
-'May It Be' by Enya
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Something from Nothing
"I just have nothing to blog about right now!"
This is the declarative statement I made just minutes ago.
It probably isn't the exact truth. No. It's not any sort of truth at all. In actuality there is so much going on internally that I have no idea where to begin or how to sort it all out. I always want to dole out some intense truth... Words of wisdom and strength... Forgetting that usually intense truth/wisdom/strength comes from a simple beginning and lots of honesty.
Honest statements for today:
1. I wish my cats were not so insane. I try to help get rid of their ear mites and am repaid with almost losing an arm.
2. While I don't like working for someone else (I would prefer to work for myself), I know I'm in the right job for me for the time being.
3. Going on a mostly raw diet is amazing, and complicated. My body is getting stronger and healthier. The healthier you are physically, the more open you become spiritually, and this leads to deep growth that is at times difficult, but always beautiful.
4. I really, really, really miss my nieces. All the time. Everyday. I cannot wait until this winter when I will live super close to them and see them all the time! (I miss other family and friends as well, of course. But sorry, none of you are nearly as cute as my three girly-whirlys!)
5. I'm learning to see past "how" people are, to "who" they are.
Actually, that last one will make a great post. That I will try to work on tomorrow: my day off. We shall see, but for today, this is all I have time for.
See you soon, and keep on pushing forward!
This is the declarative statement I made just minutes ago.
It probably isn't the exact truth. No. It's not any sort of truth at all. In actuality there is so much going on internally that I have no idea where to begin or how to sort it all out. I always want to dole out some intense truth... Words of wisdom and strength... Forgetting that usually intense truth/wisdom/strength comes from a simple beginning and lots of honesty.
Honest statements for today:
1. I wish my cats were not so insane. I try to help get rid of their ear mites and am repaid with almost losing an arm.
2. While I don't like working for someone else (I would prefer to work for myself), I know I'm in the right job for me for the time being.
3. Going on a mostly raw diet is amazing, and complicated. My body is getting stronger and healthier. The healthier you are physically, the more open you become spiritually, and this leads to deep growth that is at times difficult, but always beautiful.
4. I really, really, really miss my nieces. All the time. Everyday. I cannot wait until this winter when I will live super close to them and see them all the time! (I miss other family and friends as well, of course. But sorry, none of you are nearly as cute as my three girly-whirlys!)
5. I'm learning to see past "how" people are, to "who" they are.
Actually, that last one will make a great post. That I will try to work on tomorrow: my day off. We shall see, but for today, this is all I have time for.
See you soon, and keep on pushing forward!
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
"I want to be enough..."
Hey guys. The blog-spiration just doesn't seem to be flowing right now. I'm prepping to start a 30 day all raw food challenge, though, and I think that will clear A LOT of the brain fuzz. Thursday is another new beginning. For now, I thought I'd share a little poem I wrote last week:
Lightworkers
She vaguely recalls
that she made the deal,
Sealed it with a kiss
of deepest gratitude,
And set off on a Journey
to heal the earth.
She was given no tool or totem,
no magic words or special skill...
Only a light
that flickered and grew wan within,
At every turn threatening
to extinguish -
Leaving her alone
in the blackness.
Still,
on she plunged,
A willing sacrifice
for the souls she loved.
If she could but reach upward,
seize the edge of the heavens,
and pull with all her might
Then all the stars
and all the suns
and all the moons
Would fall among them,
Bringing enough light
for eternal day to shine in each heart.
She knew what,
but not how.
Knowledge crept on cat's feet:
A lesson earned
from the Journey's toll.
If you press forward
toward the what,
The how will be exposed...
Tiny pinpricks of Truth
pointing out the tools to buy -
the totems to build;
Until the time when morning
would ascend from inside the Spirit
and reveal her,
A beacon of love,
A light to guide the path
of the weary souls to follow -
To fulfill their need to hope,
To lead them on
to find their own light within.
-KMJ Liming
Also, this song is really inspiring me right now. Maybe go read my last post, then have a listen!
And if I were fearless
Then I'd speak my truth
And the world would hear this
That's what I wish I'd do, yeah.
- Sara Bareilles "Let the Rain"
Lightworkers
She vaguely recalls
that she made the deal,
Sealed it with a kiss
of deepest gratitude,
And set off on a Journey
to heal the earth.
She was given no tool or totem,
no magic words or special skill...
Only a light
that flickered and grew wan within,
At every turn threatening
to extinguish -
Leaving her alone
in the blackness.
Still,
on she plunged,
A willing sacrifice
for the souls she loved.
If she could but reach upward,
seize the edge of the heavens,
and pull with all her might
Then all the stars
and all the suns
and all the moons
Would fall among them,
Bringing enough light
for eternal day to shine in each heart.
She knew what,
but not how.
Knowledge crept on cat's feet:
A lesson earned
from the Journey's toll.
If you press forward
toward the what,
The how will be exposed...
Tiny pinpricks of Truth
pointing out the tools to buy -
the totems to build;
Until the time when morning
would ascend from inside the Spirit
and reveal her,
A beacon of love,
A light to guide the path
of the weary souls to follow -
To fulfill their need to hope,
To lead them on
to find their own light within.
-KMJ Liming
Also, this song is really inspiring me right now. Maybe go read my last post, then have a listen!
And if I were fearless
Then I'd speak my truth
And the world would hear this
That's what I wish I'd do, yeah.
- Sara Bareilles "Let the Rain"
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Sometimes You Get Caught in the Rain...
Like I did a couple of weeks ago. When I locked the doors at work, it was dry and cool outside. By the time I was done closing and ready to leave, it was raining. No. Pouring.
I'm usually the person who carries an umbrella in her bag, just in case, but my umbrella broke. And assuming that the day would stay as beautiful as it had been that morning, I didn't think to grab one from the house. In fact, I didn't have any sort of jacket with me at all. So I just let the rain happen.
All around me the bar hoppers of the East Village scurried in super high heels and inappropriately tight jeans: just trying to get from awning to awning without running mascara and mused hair. (And failing gloriously, I might add!) And there I was strolling along toward Union Square as though pounds of water were not poring over me.
The way I see it, you can only get so wet. There's no a-little-bit-soaked, or, sort-of-soaked; there is just soaked. And if I was going to be soaked by the time I got to the train, I might as well walk calmly and not fall on my ass as well. Soaked is better than soaked AND bruised.
As I walked, I began to see a comparison to wet weather and truth.
Sometimes we just meander through life with a sunny day mentality: things are going smoothly, and we are content with the truth as is. These are the wonderful calm seasons in life when we can just bask in peace and simply be. Then there are the foggy or snowy times, when we can't see far in front or behind and we must content ourselves with only seeing the next step, and then the next, and then the next: slowly making our way without any surety of where we will end up.
I look at both of these periods as prepping us for growth. The sun warming us and the fog/snow forcing us to slow down. But we cannot stay in either. Too much sunlight, and we whither and dry up; Too much fog, and we become confused and depressed; Too much snow, and our hearts grow cold.
Enter truth... Those life giving, soul affirming little nuggets that we stumble upon that make the journey worth pursuing. The 'pearls of wisdom' that help us grow, make us change, and confirm what we know.
Sometimes they fall in a soft mist, covering us in fine droplets that reveal their secrets slowly over time. Sometimes they come down in small showers throughout the day; opening our eyes a little at a time. And sometimes they blow in with gale force, shake us to the core, and uproot everything we thought we knew.
Lately, for me, truth has come down in a steady sheet from the heavens into my heart. Like a rainstorm that splashes into your boots and turns your umbrella inside out and soaks you in spite of all protections you thought you had in place, truth has enveloped me... Soaked and shivering I have decided to turn my face to the sky and accept the storm. And with that acceptance comes remarkable growth. I have come to know more about who I am and what I am here for.
I challenge you: when the next rainstorm enters your life, leave the boots and umbrella at home... At least metaphorically... And let yourself get drenched.
I'm usually the person who carries an umbrella in her bag, just in case, but my umbrella broke. And assuming that the day would stay as beautiful as it had been that morning, I didn't think to grab one from the house. In fact, I didn't have any sort of jacket with me at all. So I just let the rain happen.
All around me the bar hoppers of the East Village scurried in super high heels and inappropriately tight jeans: just trying to get from awning to awning without running mascara and mused hair. (And failing gloriously, I might add!) And there I was strolling along toward Union Square as though pounds of water were not poring over me.
The way I see it, you can only get so wet. There's no a-little-bit-soaked, or, sort-of-soaked; there is just soaked. And if I was going to be soaked by the time I got to the train, I might as well walk calmly and not fall on my ass as well. Soaked is better than soaked AND bruised.
As I walked, I began to see a comparison to wet weather and truth.
Sometimes we just meander through life with a sunny day mentality: things are going smoothly, and we are content with the truth as is. These are the wonderful calm seasons in life when we can just bask in peace and simply be. Then there are the foggy or snowy times, when we can't see far in front or behind and we must content ourselves with only seeing the next step, and then the next, and then the next: slowly making our way without any surety of where we will end up.
I look at both of these periods as prepping us for growth. The sun warming us and the fog/snow forcing us to slow down. But we cannot stay in either. Too much sunlight, and we whither and dry up; Too much fog, and we become confused and depressed; Too much snow, and our hearts grow cold.
Enter truth... Those life giving, soul affirming little nuggets that we stumble upon that make the journey worth pursuing. The 'pearls of wisdom' that help us grow, make us change, and confirm what we know.
Sometimes they fall in a soft mist, covering us in fine droplets that reveal their secrets slowly over time. Sometimes they come down in small showers throughout the day; opening our eyes a little at a time. And sometimes they blow in with gale force, shake us to the core, and uproot everything we thought we knew.
Lately, for me, truth has come down in a steady sheet from the heavens into my heart. Like a rainstorm that splashes into your boots and turns your umbrella inside out and soaks you in spite of all protections you thought you had in place, truth has enveloped me... Soaked and shivering I have decided to turn my face to the sky and accept the storm. And with that acceptance comes remarkable growth. I have come to know more about who I am and what I am here for.
I challenge you: when the next rainstorm enters your life, leave the boots and umbrella at home... At least metaphorically... And let yourself get drenched.
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